I met an ex-university mate yesterday. He was posted here for work, about 2 years ago. When he first came, he was engaged. Then things didn't quite work out for him, and he is now single... and has been for the past 5 months plus.
He is now on THREE dating apps (not one is Tinder!), and he is multitasking like no other. He has been relentlessly encouraging me to do the same. He had some 'words of wisdom' on the dating scene in New York to 'encourage' me.
- "New York is the best place to meet someone, there are so many young people, who are single and all looking for love" - Yes, I agree to this statement. There are approximately 8.5mn people in the city. About half are male, and of that about 60% is between the age group of 19-64. That gives me ~2.5mn guys (including those that are above 50... :S) Lol.. jokes. There is also a diverse range of people you can meet.
- "However, because of the vast selection, no one is really serious. They are fickle because they don't know if that person is the one, and they want to date others to figure it out!" - This is what I am fearful of. What if I find a guy, we go on a few dates, and I think I can get serious with him and he thinks the same too, BUT he doesn't want to get serious because he is not done 'scrutinising' the dating scene :-O. I know my fragile heart will not be able to take it. #ifiamanoptionpleaseleaveme
- "Dating is a numbers game!" - Ok, this I have heard over and over again from my friends who were lucky to find love on Tinder. I have been told by so many people to go out more, to hang out with different people more, to go on dating apps, etc, but I feel doing all of those is not me - it's like I am forcing it! And isn't the age-old advice to be yourself and do what makes you feel comfortable? Deep down, I DO NOT agree it's a numbers game. If it is meant to be, it will be. You will somehow meet someone in some way (through friends, at a party, in the most random way possible), then you get to know each other, and if you both 'click', both invest time to get to know each other better, and things work out - of course there is compromise and all. We can't go running around 'kissing all the frogs to find a prince' - well, at least I can't.
Here's the thing - I am sort of a traditionalist in this sense. As above, I believe in meeting a person in a more 'traditional' sense (not online). I have always been wary of the online dating scene (hence it NEVER and will NEVER work for me - the law of attraction). I downloaded Tinder in KL once and it didn't work out. Sorry Tinder, it's not you, it's me! Lol
Anyways, let me give you an overview of the dating apps my friend is on. You may find better luck using it (than Tinder), where ever you are.
- Bumble - similar to Tinder but what's different is the app permits only women to start a chat with their matches, but the woman must initiate the conversation within 24 hours. If not, the match expires.
- Hinge - this app is a way to match with people you're connected to through friends on social media. Practically, that means it can't offer the endless pool that exists on sites like Tinder.
- The League - this is an exclusive app, and you must get an approval to be a 'member'. You log in with your Facebook profile, but unlike any apps, The League also asks for your LinkedIn information. What's also different, the League only gives you five matches per day. At 5pm, five new matches pop up. Once you go through them, you’re done for the day.
I finally caved in under my friend's persistence. So, I downloaded just one app - under his advice, I downloaded Bumble. Hmmm... well, I guess because of the location, most of the guys look like this:
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| #notmycupofteacoffeeglassofwine I need someone more exotic looking |
and are mostly corporate lawyers or investment bankers - nooo! #againstmyprinciples
With that, I uninstalled the app (in less than 24 hours) and decided to stick with my conventional ways..lol
From my outing yesterday, what I gathered is that New York is a great place to meet people. 90% of the people in New York are on some dating app (or all dating apps) meeting people, unsure if they will settle with the person at the end. #genyproblems
With that, I uninstalled the app (in less than 24 hours) and decided to stick with my conventional ways..lol
From my outing yesterday, what I gathered is that New York is a great place to meet people. 90% of the people in New York are on some dating app (or all dating apps) meeting people, unsure if they will settle with the person at the end. #genyproblems
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